Idea!!
The solution for every damn problem is here!
(No no, not Idea 3G re. Uff!!)
It’s.. wait for it..
A reality show!
You have gudu-gudu in your tummy? Not to worry. We will help you. Just write in to us, and we will help you, on our show “Televisional Atyaachaar.”
First we will set up hidden cameras in your bathroom, living room, kitchen etc, and place underwear- I mean, undercover agents yeverywhere. On your terrace, under the overhead water-tank, will be the olinju-nokkal room. From there, we will monitor everything.
On day 1 of Mission ‘Why tummy gudu-gudu doing’, our cameras will keep an eye on your bathroom activities. How many times do you go to the bathroom, how long do you spend in there each time, what sounds you make, etc. If we see that you sing while doing potty, then we will note down those songs and do a detailed analysis. For eg:- if you sang “ Aao na aao na" from Kyon..ho gaya na?, then that means you’re not having a good day. If you sang “Where do you go, my lovely” by that englees band, then that means in full flow it is going off.
Day two, we will monitor kitchen activities. What is being cooked, what are the ingredients, how much mirchi your mummy puts in your sabji, how clean your kitchen is, etc. We will then call a Kitchen Expert Lady to give her opinion. “You see, the kitchen is facing north, but the gas stove is facing north-west. I believe that is what is causing the problem. If the gas is placed 45 degree to the south and 56.3 degree to the west, then the problem can be solved.”
Finally, after all the investigations and monitoring and olinju-nokkals and expert opinions, there will be a final confrontation. Everyone will sit together and discuss why your tummy is doing what it is doing. And this is the point where our surprise guest comes in! That longer-haired actor whose movie Kolabaathakam- Rendu is releasing next week. He will come and give the film actor’s angle to the whole thing. And then magically, everything falls into place!! You happy, your tummy happy, and yeverbody full happies! Do you notice the glow on your mummy’s and daddy’s and little chutki’s face? Full love is coming.
Then you thank Channel B for helping you. Oh, look at the tears glistening in your eyes... goes so well with the melodramatic background score. Wave, beta, wave. Wave to the camera.. Har pal yahaan, jee bhar jiyo, jo hain sama, kal ho na ho...
COMING UP NEXT WEEK!
The search for Your Colony’s Next Top Kaamwaali Bai!
Stay tuned!!!
**********
After-effects of watching “Love kiya tho darna kya" on Channel V. Wow, what a wonder! NOT.
Olinju-nokkal - literally means, to hide and see. Also known as spying.
Kolabaathakam- murder
Rendu- two.
The solution for every damn problem is here!
(No no, not Idea 3G re. Uff!!)
It’s.. wait for it..
A reality show!
You have gudu-gudu in your tummy? Not to worry. We will help you. Just write in to us, and we will help you, on our show “Televisional Atyaachaar.”
First we will set up hidden cameras in your bathroom, living room, kitchen etc, and place underwear- I mean, undercover agents yeverywhere. On your terrace, under the overhead water-tank, will be the olinju-nokkal room. From there, we will monitor everything.
On day 1 of Mission ‘Why tummy gudu-gudu doing’, our cameras will keep an eye on your bathroom activities. How many times do you go to the bathroom, how long do you spend in there each time, what sounds you make, etc. If we see that you sing while doing potty, then we will note down those songs and do a detailed analysis. For eg:- if you sang “ Aao na aao na" from Kyon..ho gaya na?, then that means you’re not having a good day. If you sang “Where do you go, my lovely” by that englees band, then that means in full flow it is going off.
Day two, we will monitor kitchen activities. What is being cooked, what are the ingredients, how much mirchi your mummy puts in your sabji, how clean your kitchen is, etc. We will then call a Kitchen Expert Lady to give her opinion. “You see, the kitchen is facing north, but the gas stove is facing north-west. I believe that is what is causing the problem. If the gas is placed 45 degree to the south and 56.3 degree to the west, then the problem can be solved.”
Finally, after all the investigations and monitoring and olinju-nokkals and expert opinions, there will be a final confrontation. Everyone will sit together and discuss why your tummy is doing what it is doing. And this is the point where our surprise guest comes in! That longer-haired actor whose movie Kolabaathakam- Rendu is releasing next week. He will come and give the film actor’s angle to the whole thing. And then magically, everything falls into place!! You happy, your tummy happy, and yeverbody full happies! Do you notice the glow on your mummy’s and daddy’s and little chutki’s face? Full love is coming.
Then you thank Channel B for helping you. Oh, look at the tears glistening in your eyes... goes so well with the melodramatic background score. Wave, beta, wave. Wave to the camera.. Har pal yahaan, jee bhar jiyo, jo hain sama, kal ho na ho...
COMING UP NEXT WEEK!
The search for Your Colony’s Next Top Kaamwaali Bai!
Stay tuned!!!
**********
After-effects of watching “Love kiya tho darna kya" on Channel V. Wow, what a wonder! NOT.
Olinju-nokkal - literally means, to hide and see. Also known as spying.
Kolabaathakam- murder
Rendu- two.
'.. in full flow it is going off':D Priceless...
ReplyDeleteThis, true story:P
Good one..
ammma awesommee! Trust me, dude, I literally fell off my chair laughing! You can write a great deal, like you know all those pichi deal sites groupon, social living etc etc!! :D Graaatt!! Nenu mentioning you in my blog! This was realll phunnii :D ogay? :D
ReplyDeleteWat a louly cancept!
ReplyDeleteHaha Kolabathakam rendu was awesome!
I am having gudu gudu in my tummy, send the ollinju nokaal team please na!
@Priyanka: I wanted to give a proper visual effect. :p
ReplyDelete@DawnZhang: Mention-andi mention-andi. :p Naakkemi problem ledhu. :D
@Red Handed: Always at your service, ma'm. Sending my underwear agents right away. :p
ha ha!! all the people having guddu guddu in their team must be having a dumb struck tummy now :P
ReplyDeleteLoved the bathromm olinju nokkal team!! :) those songs of relief when it flows full!! :P
@Cindrella: Yes yes, moosic is vary vary impaartent for a smooth bowel movement. :P
ReplyDeleteLOL!! It's like yelling at those reality shows- "HA! IN YOUR FACE!" :D :D Really Phunni!:D
ReplyDelete@Anvita: Correct. One tight slap! :P
ReplyDeleteThanks! :)
Hahaahha... aweeesome fun reading it.. too good
ReplyDelete@Musings: Thank you.
ReplyDeleteToo funny Spiff! Olinju nokkal room and whole potty sequence, hilarious! :D
ReplyDeleteOn a serious note, what's reality TV coming to? :/ I dread the day where everything will come with a hidden camera and record all that you do. Spooky! :O
@Destiny's Child: Thanks!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, right? It's like we never know whether we're being followed or not! For all we know, we might be on the next reality show. :/